Rewrite Your Story, Rewire Your Personal Brand with Amber Lee Forrester
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Description
Your inner voice can either talk you into your greatness or talk you out of it. That little voice shows up when you're about to take a risk, ask for something you want, or step into a room where you're not sure you belong. Most people either ignore it completely or let it run the show. Neither works. The real question is whether you know how to catch it, redirect it, and make it work for you instead of against you.
Amber Lee Forrester built Quartz Wellness Collective on the idea that your inner voice shapes everything about your brand. She works with executives and incarcerated youth, bringing positive psychology and strengths-based coaching into spaces that need psychological safety and honest reflection. Her approach is direct: if you can identify the thought patterns that derail you, you can redirect them toward what you actually want.
In this episode of Branding Room Only, Paula T. Edgar and Amber dig into imposter syndrome, why it shows up even for high-performers, and what to do when that voice tries to take over. Amber breaks down her framework for catching thoughts before they derail you, why reflection matters more than just pushing through, and how to lean on your strengths when your weaknesses try to speak louder. They also talk about why community and psychological safety matter for doing your best work, and what it actually looks like to build a brand that feels like you on purpose. If that voice has ever made you second-guess yourself or shrink back from something you wanted, this conversation gives you tools to shift it.
Chapters
1:33 – Amber’s personal brand definition, three ways she describes herself, a Friedrich Nietzsche she often uses, and her Beyoncé hype song
4:27 – The childhood contrast that explains Amber’s comfort in very different rooms
5:37 – Amber’s post-private school pivot from her original plan to her purpose
11:25 – Amber’s definition of imposter syndrome and an example of how it showed up for her
16:10 – How imposter syndrome affects your brand and the way you show up as a leader
19:54 – How positive psychology helps you challenge narratives that undermine your confidence and branding
22:40 – The framework Amber uses to move people from self-doubt to self-belief
28:14 – Misconception about imposter syndrome, the importance of reflection, and how your answer to a simple question impacts your brand
32:27 – Amber’s high priority around creating safe community spaces, paving the way for brave spaces
36:56 – Strengths-based anchor that helps you stay steady when your mind tries to hold you back
42:46 – What Amber does for fun (and how even that ties back into her brand)
44:53 – The one brand aspect Amber refuses to compromise and her holistic Branding Room Only magic
Connect With Amber Lee Forrester
Amber Lee Forrester is a life and leadership coach, purpose-driven entrepreneur, author, and founder of Quartz Wellness Collective, a modern well-being and leadership development company at the intersection of personal transformation and organizational excellence. The Quartz Wellness Collective brings together positive psychology, restorative practices, social-emotional learning, neuroscience, and strengths-based coaching to help people find their flow and flourish individually, collectively, and systemically.
A trailblazer in Positive Psychology, Social & Emotional Learning, and Well-Being, Amber is a Chief Empowerment Officer and the catalyst for change. From launching The Well Zone (a transformative virtual learning hub) to impressing the likes of Daymond John and Lori Greineron Shark Tank with her entrepreneurial spirit, her journey has been nothing short of inspirational.
But it's not just her accolades that stand out. It's her commitment to empower businesses, organizations, and communities with knowledge that's both deeply personal and scientifically grounded. Amber's voice has resonated across platforms - ABC, E!, BET, BNC, Essence Wellness Festival, National Urban League Conference, and more. For a daily dose of inspiration, you can find her on YouTube and Instagram.
Amber Lee Forrester | Instagram | LinkedIn
Quartz Wellness Collective | YouTube | Instagram | LinkedIn
POISED to Prosper Mentorship Program | Workbook
Mentioned In Rewrite Your Story, Rewire Your Personal Brand with Amber Lee Forrester
“Throwback to me presenting Kane & Couture on Shark Tank” - Instagram Post
Council of Urban Professionals
David Rock | “SCARF: a brain-based model for collaborating with and influencing others” - NeuroLeadership Journal, Issue One, 2008
CliftonStrengths Assessment | VIA Character Strengths Assessment
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Sponsor for this episode
This episode is brought to you by PGE Consulting Group LLC.
PGE Consulting Group LLC empowers individuals and organizations to lead with purpose, presence, and impact. Specializing in leadership development and personal branding, we offer keynotes, custom programming, consulting, and strategic advising—all designed to elevate influence and performance at every level.
Founded and led by Paula Edgar, our work centers on practical strategies that enhance professional development, strengthen workplace culture, and drive meaningful, measurable change.
To learn more about Paula and her services, go to www.paulaedgar.com or contact her at info@paulaedgar.com, and follow Paula Edgar and the PGE Consulting Group LLC on LinkedIn.
Transcript
Paula Edgar: Welcome to Branding Room Only, the podcast where your personal brand gets a front-row seat. I'm Paula Edgar, and if you're here, it's because you know your brand isn't just about what you do. It's about how people experience you. In each episode, you'll hear stories, strategies, and lessons from leaders and influencers who built their brands and made their mark. And I'll share the tools you need to do the same. Let's go.
Hi, everybody. It's Paula Edgar, your host of Branding Room Only, and we're back today with another wonderful conversation. Let me tell you about my guest. Today's guest is Amber Lee Forrester. She's a life and leadership coach, purpose-driven entrepreneur, and author. She's the founder of Quartz Wellness Collective, a modern well-being and leadership development company at the intersection of personal transformation and organizational excellence.
The Quartz Wellness Collective brings together positive psychology, restorative practices, social-emotional learning, neuroscience, and strengths-based coaching to help people find their flow and flourish individually, collectively, and systemically. Amber, welcome to the Branding Room.
Amber Lee Forrester: Paula, I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having me.
Paula Edgar: You're welcome. So, y'all, I had a chance to see Amber speak. You all know I talk about my experience as a CUP Fellow a lot. She had an opportunity to speak to all of us at the alumni gathering. I was like, "You have to be on my podcast." She graciously said yes.
So let's jump into the conversation. Amber, when you think about personal branding, what does it mean to you? How would you define it?
Amber Lee Forrester: It is the way that we are telling the world who we are and what we stand for, whether we're an individual, a company, an organization. It's how we say who we are.
Paula Edgar: Yeah. Love it. How would you say you are in three words or short phrases? How would you define yourself?
Amber Lee Forrester: I would say that I am positive. I would say that I am community-based, and I would say that I am a reflection of excellence. I strive for excellence, and I'd love for that to be a part of my brand and everything I do. I'm very intentional about paying attention to the detail that makes the excellence come through.
Paula Edgar: I'm here for that. Tell me, do you have a favorite quote or motto that comes for you today? Something that's in your mind today?
Amber Lee Forrester: Yeah. So this is probably going to lead into some of what we talk about and discuss, my angle on branding and how I look at things just from a holistic perspective. So Friedrich Nietzsche is a philosopher who has a quote that I often use and that I really, truly believe in. It's, "He who has a why to live can get through any how."
Paula Edgar: Oh, I love that. Purpose-driven.
Amber Lee Forrester: So purpose-driven.
Paula Edgar: I love that.
Amber Lee Forrester: So whether we are that person trying to make it through a very challenging time, whether we're that professional that has our eye on the prize and we know what that is, that why, that knowing what we're doing and why just makes that how so much more bearable. There's so much more motivation. So that I do, whether it's with a troubled youth or an executive team, that's what I lean on.
Paula Edgar: That resonates very deeply. I love that. So tell me about this. When they're going to get full Amber Lee Forrester coming in the room, what song is playing in the back of your head? What's your hype song?
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh, my God, it's Beyoncé. Definitely. It depends on my mood that day. It's usually from the Lion King soundtrack, and it's like "Mood 4 Eva" is my thing. Again, this is the holistic perspective. I make sure that I have settled my nervous system, that I have done my routine in the morning, that when I come in, a part of my brand is coming in with a positive energy.
Because there's a woman, I do professional development and training, there's a woman you probably have heard of, Elena Aguilar, who says, "Make your PDs a party." So it's professional development. There's something to people knowing that, okay, we got to do this training or workshop, but we know Amber's going to bring some music. We know that she's going to bring some engagement, and we're not just going to sit there and stare at her.
Paula Edgar: I love that. This is a very Beyoncé-friendly podcast, so we're here for it. Tell me, Amber, where did you grow up, and how do you think that shaped you?
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh my gosh. I love that question. I am from the D. That's Detroit. I know that it shaped me and my curiosity and comfort in different situations. I grew up in the city of Detroit as a young child. Then in high school, I got a scholarship to go to an amazing school. My mom was able to move us out to the suburbs, so life changed a lot in high school.
I'm at this private school in the suburbs in Beverly Hills, Michigan. Yes, y'all, Beverly Hills, Michigan has a Beverly Hills.
Paula Edgar: Who knew?
Amber Lee Forrester: So it's like you have the hood, and then you have Beverly Hills, Michigan, and they're like 15 minutes from each other. I'm going between them.
It still speaks to just me and my ability. Like I said, I do work from corporate, working with executives, to work with juvenile justice, with incarcerated youth. I'm comfortable in those environments, and I can come into those spaces. I think that's what really helps me to connect with people to do the work that I love doing with them.
Paula Edgar: I love that. So tell me about your career path post private school. What did you do? How did you get to be in front of us right now?
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh my gosh. So I said, I got to go to New York because I'm this little girl in Detroit. I have never been to New York before. I just see it in the movies, and I see the entertainment industry is happening. This is me in the late '90s in high school. So I am like, wow, look at how Black people are shining in New York. This whole thing is building, and I want to be in entertainment marketing. That's what I identified for myself as a use of my skills and my interest.
So I go to Fordham University, and I go for four years. I'm never going back home. I'm in New York. Love it here. So I get into marketing. My career started in marketing. I actually won a VJ contest during when VJs were a thing. I got to do a concert tour, and it was a marketing. I understood as a marketing student that this was actually a marketing strategy that I'm a part of. So I was very intentional about the interviews that I did and the way that I engaged with local celebrities and spoke up the brand. I got branding early on.
So this same company that hired me to be the VJ for the concert tour actually gave me my first job and was the reason I started my first business right after college.
Paula Edgar: Oh, wow.
Amber Lee Forrester: Yeah. So I started working in entertainment marketing, managing budgets in the entertainment industry and with entertainment industry-focused clients. Then I did that for a few years. I moved to Miami, started a dog apparel company. We could have some interesting branding conversations.
Paula Edgar: A dog apparel company?
Amber Lee Forrester: A dog apparel and accessory company called Kane & Couture. I got on Shark Tank.
Paula Edgar: What?
Amber Lee Forrester: I got on Shark Tank and got investment from Daymond and Lori, which behind the scenes, like a number of businesses, they have to go through due diligence, so you don't always get the money. But on TV, I won Shark Tank. That's what people call it. They're like, "You won Shark Tank?"
Paula Edgar: We got to find that clip. We need this clip. We need this clip in the show notes. Okay, go ahead.
Amber Lee Forrester: So that actually was what parlayed me into the space that I'm in now in personal and professional development. Because my own personal and professional development is a very intentional process. After Shark Tank, I had business owners who were coming to me for mentorship and coaching. Then I had schools that kept asking me to come and speak with their students. I really enjoyed it. I started to enjoy that more than my dog apparel and accessory company.
My purpose was evolving because I was evolving. So I started Quartz Wellness Collective. I went back to school. I got a number of certifications in positive psychology, social-emotional learning. Then I went to get my master's in restorative practices. I got certified in coaching, and I took all of that and turned it into this positive lifestyle company called Quartz Wellness Collective. I made a long story short enough. Sorry. That was a bit.
Paula Edgar: Wow. No, no, no. Listen. First of all, I'm rewinding because let's talk about the VJ time. Anybody who sticks out in terms of people who you interviewed? Was anything like, I don't know. Tell me a story from your VJ days.
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh, yeah. There was one. I said my friends always laugh at me because they're older than I am. So when I said this, they were like, "How are you so clueless?" But I said we were in Philadelphia, I believe. This guy comes up on the, it was Seagram's Gin Live that I was working with, it was the gold carpet, purple carpet, I can't remember. It was some color carpet.
He's so cute. I'm like, "We got somebody real special here with us tonight. What's your name?" And he's like, "Special Ed." I was like, "Oh, wait, that's really Special Ed." You know, I'm a little girl from Detroit. I'm not meeting celebrities. So many of the people who my aunt used to listen to are now just showing up in this different city, and I'm getting to interview them. It felt really special for me because it was my first time interviewing celebrities.
Paula Edgar: Yeah. Especially everybody, shout out to my '90s people and also for Brooklyn. Shout out to Special Ed. One of the first raps I knew all the way through was "I Got It Made." But anyway, I date myself, and it's fine because I'm so cute.
So anyway, okay. So that was really interesting. I ask this question because I realized it's so much in where people are from and what they have done that when they tell it, it is very different than the flat-on-the-page bio, right? It's how they light up when they tell the things and they show the things, and it's where people can see our paths are so varied.
They are never this linear thing that we think they're going to be. So I'm very glad that you answered that question robustly and we got to hear that you were on Shark Tank and a VJ and outside. Okay. All right.
Amber Lee Forrester: Thank you for giving me the opportunity to recount that. Even in my own head, it is a moment of appreciation to sit and think about the journey. So I appreciate the question.
Paula Edgar: It really is. When you think about from whence you have come and where you are and where you will be, it's wonderful to take stock of that. So I'm glad we had the opportunity to do that together.
So speaking of doing together, I myself also do a lot of professional development, mostly for lawyers. So when I see people speak, I have a very high standard for what I expect from them. Not a lot of people always reach it. You did, which is why I was like, "Oh, she needs to be on my podcast," because I was actually listening. So that's a good thing.
You talked about when you spoke to our CUP class, you spoke to us about imposter syndrome. It's something that people talk about a lot. There's always, I always call it like the Bloods and the Crips, and people are fighting like it's this, it's that. Some people are saying it's individual. Some people are saying it's the organization or the circumstance. Some people are saying it's both.
I really love the way that you defined what it is because it felt more accessible than I've heard before. So I want you to share how you define imposter syndrome and how it has shown up for you, if at all, and the people who you've worked with. How has it become an area where you wanted to talk about?
Amber Lee Forrester: Yeah. So I don't know if I'm going to say it exactly how I said it, but I define imposter syndrome as that little voice that gets into the back of our head and tries to talk us out of our greatness. That little voice that tries to drag us back into the past or project us too far into the future, where we can't really just be present and grounded in the moment of where we are and appreciative of that.
That silent voice that we've all heard in a different way, psychology will tell you that it might be your parents' voice because the voice that our parents had was probably one of the most heavy things to carry, knowing that my voice is going to turn into the voice of my child, because that's what happens to us, right? And so if you have something that's unprocessed from childhood, that little inner voice is that inner child or it's that parent that was very domineering, or it could be that parent that was very supportive, depending on the health of your inner voice.
But when it's imposter syndrome, it's usually trying to take us on a downward spiral of believing a bunch of stories that we've made up that are not serving us well. We all experience that in one way or another at some point, if we're honest with ourselves. So normalizing it, knowing what it sounds like, and learning how to talk back to it is a part of what I try to shine a light on and give tools for, as opposed to acting like it doesn't happen, sweeping it under the rug.
Because branding, in order for us to be authentic, we need to recognize how these things happen and how they could get in our way so that we don't let them. I guess that's what I'm trying to say. So yeah, I start with imposter syndrome. I teach on it, and I still do.
I think I gave you guys an example that day. I came into CUP. CUP is amazing, for anyone who's watching, the Council of Urban Professionals. You've probably heard Paula say it 5,000 times. It's just as incredible as she says it is. So I come into this group of amazing professionals and realize everyone knows each other. Oh, wait, Paula speaks before I speak, and going after Paula is no easy feat. I don't know these people. I'm starting from one. My technology is messed up, and I've got to go without my slides. This is my time to shine in front of these amazing people who I respect.
So that voice in my head for a moment could have talked me into getting nervous, focusing on the problems. I was like, "No, no, no, no, no. Hello, honey, you are a strength-based coach. So get it together, lean on the strength, and let's move forward and rock this out." So I think that's just an example of here I am having imposter syndrome as I'm going to talk on imposter syndrome, but I talked myself out of it. So can everyone.
Paula Edgar: That's, I think, what really resonated, was the authenticity of you navigating the challenge. As someone who's a speaker, and we have a lot of speakers and entrepreneurs who listen to the podcast, we all know that Rihanna is going to be in microbraid, or whatever the thing is. Something's going to happen where Mercury is going to do crazy stuff, and you have to be prepared.
Sometimes we're using the slides as something to lean on. But truthfully, when it's an area of expertise, we know it. We just want to be able to have the experience for the folks be one that is visual and also auditory, et cetera, so they're learning better. But you're not freaking out, you're being measured was very much what resonated for the folks in the space. Right? Because so many times people are like, "I am the person, and nothing ever happens wrong." It's like, "No, no, no, no."
Amber Lee Forrester: You know what? But even like that, I'm the flow coach. That's part of my brand online, right? How am I going to get there? I have to go with the flow. It's a part of what I teach, but it's a part of what I embody. It was happening in real life. It's like, okay, you say you flow, so flow while Mercury—
Paula Edgar: Well, you did. You flowed. It all worked. It worked well.
So tell me about this. When you work or think about the leaders, even the students, educators, entrepreneurs who you have supported, do you see any patterns when it comes to how imposter syndrome affects how they show up and how they either show or hide parts of what their authentic personal brand is?
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh yeah, definitely. Because, well, one, I always say I look for patterns and not problems. That's just my approach, to look for a pattern in a situation.
We are motivated by the same things that we're threatened by.
Paula Edgar: Say more. Say more.
Amber Lee Forrester: David Rock has this really awesome paper about it. He talks about the SCARF model, which stands for status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness, and fairness. So when imposter syndrome shows up, some of the same things that motivate us can threaten us. It's like the other side of that thing, which often is authenticity.
So if I'm feeling in my power, in my highest self, at my best, on a good day, then I'm authentic. I'm aligned. I'm being who I am. I'm showing up without the mask on. But if something shows up and throws me out of my authenticity, or if a thought shows up and somehow I start getting in my way, I'm not feeling as authentic. Now it's a threat.
When people are threatened, they tend to attack themselves, attack others, withdraw, or they just completely avoid it. So knowing that, this is a part of what I study in restorative practices, so knowing that, I'm seeing when it's showing up and I'm going, okay, so let me help them open up to be more authentic or let me help them explore whatever is coming up for them, as opposed to just shying away and getting uncomfortable about it because they're having imposter syndrome.
It's like, hold on. It's almost like a dance sometimes. If you get on a dance floor and you're dancing, and if you mess up and your dance partner realizes that you messed up and then the whole thing is off. But if your dance partner keeps going, sometimes we just need people to keep going. It's okay you messed up. Okay, now keep going.
So when I'm working with someone, I like to point it out and then look at ways to either correct it in the moment or reflect on it later and correct it, but not look at it as a bad thing. It's just a thing that happened. Now we notice it, so we know how to navigate it.
Paula Edgar: It's like curiosity instead of judgment, right? It's engagement. That's a helpful thing, particularly because from whatever level or whatever context that you're working with folks in, I think specifically about leaders and leaders who don't want to seem shakable, they want to seem like they have everything together.
I think real leadership that resonates for people is when folks are authentic and vulnerable and are able to say, "You know what, today ain't it," or, "Yeah, I messed up, and this is how we're going to go forward." Folks will connect more with that than not.
I read something years ago that said something like 70% of people who have been in leadership who were surveyed said that they'd had imposter syndrome. I thought of it as something for underrepresented folks. That's when I had a big shift, where I was like, "What do you mean all the leaders said that they had it?" But it's true when you think about your initial definition. It's what that little voice is, what that thing is that can take you out or lift you up. Now I've got to go apologize to my kids. But anyway. I'll pay for therapy. It's all good.
Amber Lee Forrester: It's all therapeutic.
Paula Edgar: That part. So tell me, what does positive psychology, the work you've read in that space, how does that science of well-being help people to challenge those narratives that can undermine confidence and their brand and how they show up? How does that work?
Amber Lee Forrester: I think the most fascinating thing is that it normalizes things that we tend to be ashamed of. When things can be normalized and recognized that this is a challenge that people face in these different ways, and there's a science to it, knowing that science, people go, "Huh, okay, so I'm not crazy." Then it becomes more manageable when you're able.
So like, I'll read. This is when I'm geeking out. I'm reading a research paper that is talking about something like imposter syndrome. Then it says that these are the five ways that, whether it be coaches or whoever is working with people and helping them to overcome it. Now I know this, and I can say, "How do I apply this and work with this person?" Whether it's imposter syndrome or whatever, the psychology, so much of what we do is the psychology.
Like, you have these companies and they want to make a lot of money. So you want to be innovative. But if you don't have a safe space psychologically for the people who work within your company, it's not going to be a safe space. So if your leader can't say, "I made a mistake," then other people can't say, "I made a mistake." Then people start sweeping things under the rug, and it becomes an issue that gets in the way of productivity or worse.
So talking about the psychology of it, to me, I think it disarms people in a way and makes it like brass tacks. Like, "So what are we doing now that we know this?" That's the DME, the Detroit. It's like, "What are we doing now? Now that we know this, what are we doing? Let's party. Let's put things on. Let's call it professional development and tackle it." My clients and the work that I do—because it's, guys, this happens everywhere. Whether it's everywhere in the company or everywhere in the world, people are people. These are issues that people deal with when they work together.
Paula Edgar: That's why I often say, everyone's talking now about how AI is taking over. I was like, "AI is going to be additive, but it can never take over because it cannot replace our interaction as people, right?" It can model a lot of things and make things faster, but it cannot. In fact, when people rely too much on it, you can see because it doesn't have the people part of it. Like, you can see the output because it doesn't include that magic that is who we all are.
Amber Lee Forrester: It doesn't have a soul.
Paula Edgar: Exactly. Exactly. Exactly.
Amber Lee Forrester: People like you and I are mean with some AI when we use it as a tool, right?
Paula Edgar: Correct. Correct. It's a tool, not a crutch, and it is not a replacement. All of those things, mark that down.
Anyway. So, okay, I really wanted you to share this. So talk about your framework of how to move people from self-doubt to self-belief. What are some of the shifts that you see when people start to align those stories? And you didn't say this, but this is how I perceive it: It's like when there's a lie happening and you've got to refute it, right? Because usually the thing you're telling yourself is not a truth, or it's a past truth, so not your current situation.
So tell me, what framework do you use when you're trying to help people go from, "I don't like it. I don't like myself. I don't like this thing," to "Here I am." Tell me the magic of Amber.
Amber Lee Forrester: So it is really getting aware of how we're talking to ourselves. It's learning when to catch those thoughts, when those thoughts come up, and what those thoughts are. Really in a moment of reflection, when you're not in that, what I try to do is get people to reflect on situations when they're not in the emotional intensity of it. So when you're in the same space, reflecting back on your patterns—like we said, patterns, not problems—reflecting back on your patterns, looking at thought patterns, looking at things that are triggering you, and recognizing what happens. What's the routine that you go into when that happens? If you can identify it, then you can curveball it. Like, "Wait a minute, when that happens, I'm not going to do that thing."
Cognitive behavioral therapy tells you ABC: there's an adversity that happens, there's a belief that comes up, and there's a consequence. So really, that's the framework behind it. But I'm saying it, or pointing it out in a different way of working with someone: the adversity is the trigger. What are you thinking when that comes up? And if I can get them to be open and honest enough with themselves about what that belief really is, that's where the magic is, because that's where the rewiring, the whole neural science of it is. Our reality is only our reality because we told ourselves it is real. So if you're telling yourself a story that's not serving you, how can we rewrite that story in a way that serves you better?
So you respond, and you go into this routine, and you get something that you don't really want. What do you want? I want to be like this. Because if you're in imposter syndrome, you're not getting what you want. It's either taking a toll on your relationships because you're showing up in a way of insecurity or you're passive aggressive, or it's taking a toll on your career. It can really talk us out of our greatness.
When we recognize when that's happening, what brings that up, and what thoughts we have, and then we redirect them toward what we want to be manifesting in our lives, we start to see it. Then we start to get a reward, and then we get a dopamine rush. Then we come into our confidence like that.
We have to be willing to try something a little different. I'll tell my clients, "Just try it on." They'll be like, "Oh my God, that sounds funny to say in my head." But does it sound better than the mean things you've been saying to yourself? That's not funny. That's just normal. But it's not because it's not helping you.
We try on something new and rewire that because our brains have neuroplasticity. Our brains can be rewired, but we have to be aware of the patterns we go into and brave enough to try something different.
Paula Edgar: Yes, everybody. Welcome to my therapy. I'm wondering if my therapist is listening to my podcast.
Amber Lee Forrester: It's therapeutic branding.
Paula Edgar: I mean, everyone gets the benefit of the fact that I have a weekly therapist who makes sure that the world does not get the wrath of what it could be.
One of the things that I incorporated when I started to do therapy weekly was positive talk. So, listen. My nickname is Pollyanna. Like, I have joy. But I realized I can go into that spiral. I'm sure people are going to listen and be like, "You?" I'm like, "Yeah, you." So it's a little bit like, "Hey, remember who you are. Remember how you show up." I tell my kids all the time, "Remember you're an Edgar. When they walk out the door, remember who you are, and whence you came," because we have been through a lot. We've done through a lot. And you're great already by yourself. No matter what happens today, you're great. I remind myself of the same thing.
While I don't get nervous when I speak—I speak all the time—I don't get nervous, I do have the excitement that makes me feel like, "Oh, okay. I'm excited. I'm excited." Those can feel similar, right? People are like, "Are you nervous?" I'm like, "No."
Amber Lee Forrester: That's the other side of that motivation. That's what I was trying to say. Beyoncé gets nervous when she goes on stage.
Paula Edgar: Beyoncé is Sasha Fierce. I need to come up with my other name. Like, I need to be like, I don't know, Patricia Jenkins. I'm going to just throw up.
Amber Lee Forrester: Name her. Did she just get names here?
Paula Edgar: I don't know. I feel like it’s got to have a lot in front of it.
Amber Lee Forrester: You said a lot.
Paula Edgar: Yes. Like La Paula, it's got to be something else. I gotta switch it off.
Amber Lee Forrester: I like La Paula. I like La Paula. I don't know. Listeners, listen in and tell y'all. Tell her if y'all like La Paula.
Paula Edgar: I guess I would like to know. It might have to be a thing like, "Here she is: The Paula De La Branding." That's my name.
Amber Lee Forrester: I like her. I like her.
Paula Edgar: Entire mess, but that's going to be the name. It's going to be in everything. Okay, so I love that. I love talking about that shift because it's such an important one. I can tell that it would be transformative when people actually get that. Tell me though, is there any kind of misconceptions that people navigate around imposter syndrome that you might want people to understand a little bit better? Like, is there anything that you think is a bad brand on imposter syndrome?
Amber Lee Forrester: I would say, to think that it's something that just goes away completely, we like to check things off our box, especially as professionals and entrepreneurs, we're like, "Check that, check that." But there are these things that just naturally happen to us as humans that we can't just check off and be like, "I'm done with that."
One of the things I was going to say earlier, and I went in a different direction, is about the importance of reflection. Reflection is critical, especially for high-functioning, high-powered individuals, because without reflection, without taking the time to sit still and look back at what we're doing, what we're thinking, how we're showing up, and how it's impacting our environment, we can't reach our full potential.
So whether that be imposter syndrome, whether that be the positive self-talk, there are times when the most common thing people ask is, "What, how are you doing?" "What are you doing?" Even how you answer, "How are you doing?" can be a part of your brand, right? "How are you doing?" is such an automatic answer that we give, and some people don't realize that they're putting out a negative brand for themselves by answering in that same way.
There are people who answer how you're doing and it's, "Oh, well," and it's like you know, so I had a friend shout out to my girlfriend, Vicky, I love her so much. You say, "How are you doing?" and she says, "I'm great and grateful." That's what it is. No matter what she was going through, she would say, "I'm great and grateful," and then she'd open up and start talking about what she's grateful for.
People who know her as a bright, shining light—even with something like her close family member passing away—her answer, "I'm great and grateful," became a part of what people expected from her and a part of how they engaged with her. So that is something that I think she reflected on and realized was part of her magic and made it a part of her maybe brand, unconsciously.
But yeah, that reflection is just going to be key and knowing whatever that is, whether it's working for you or not.
Paula Edgar: I love that. It resonates because, especially in recent times, that automatic "I'm fine" when people say, "How are you doing?" does not serve anyone because we need to relate to each other better. So I had started to pause, actually tap in, and think, "How am I?" and then respond. What I have co-opted—someone said to me, and I was like, "I'm taking that"—is "I'm fine, but I'm not okay." Where it is that I am physically fine. I don't feel like I'm—but the world is doing what the world is doing right now. So I can't be okay in that. And that resonates because people are like, no matter where they are, that connects with them. I also will say, "I'm blessed and highly favored," which is always true.
Amber Lee Forrester: That's what I used to always say. "I'm blessed and highly favored no matter what." I appreciate that "I'm fine, but I'm not okay." Yeah, because I mean, I think that's authentic, that's real, and yet it owns where you are, but then it gives people hope that if she can be not okay, but yes, and shows up like, this is what that looks like, then you can do that authentically from a place of power but a place of softness.
Paula Edgar: Yeah, it's me wanting to influence through showing. By saying, like, "Hey, you might think that everything I show and show up in red lipstick and glasses," and that's usually the case, but the point is, that doesn't mean that everything is fine. There are other things that we all are struggling with something. And particularly now, many of us struggle with many things and we need to connect with that again, tapping back to our humanity.
Which makes me reflect on something that you mentioned at the beginning of our conversation, which is your commitment to community. Where does that—like, that's from you being from the D, but is there something else why community is such an important part of who you are and what you are connected to?
Amber Lee Forrester: Yeah, because safe spaces matter, and people do their best in them. So I have a high priority around creating safe spaces, which my therapist would say that I also can have control of issues, because when I curate a space, I know that I'm going to make that space safe because I want the community to happen. I want the openness. I want the vulnerability. I don't like small talk. I like deep engagement. Those things happen. I love when it happens on a date or in the boardroom. It just makes me feel like it's worth me being there. There's deep engagement happening.
So that community is what happens when there's more than one of us willing to deeply engage—a community, two of us or 2,000 of us. There's a science to it. Part of the work that I do with restorative practices is around organizational transformation and culture. The science to creating a safe space—a psychologically safe space, a community where people can be innovative, make mistakes and learn from them, empower each other, be motivated to reach a goal beyond just me beating my head against it. You know, people will show up when people are depending on them or expecting from them or vibing with them. That's unity. I like that.
For me, I probably quit and didn't really work in corporate too long because I was like, "To come on the other side of this. I can't exist in that. I can't be productive in that type of space. Get me out of here."
Paula Edgar: Yeah, we have had many conversations on this podcast about toxic spaces, toxic places, toxic leaders, toxic language, toxic—a lot of things. It reminds me that in some ways, all of us have experienced workplace trauma in some way, shape, or fashion. I used to practice labor and employment law, which I call the "All My Children of the Law," because there's always some drama. There's always something happening. You know, somebody slapped somebody or slept with somebody's husband. Like, that's the drama. While I loved it, I realized there was a lot that I was taking in and navigating those spaces even when I didn't live in them. Even dipping in and dipping out, I was still carrying a lot of those things.
So my good friend, Corey, she does not call them safe spaces. She says that she curates brave spaces. I really love that because it's being brave to open up to what you just talked about. You get into that same place. But I think that also comes from the trauma of being lawyers and knowing that a lot of places are not safe.
Amber Lee Forrester: That's Brene Brown. BRAVE. And I love brave spaces, and I appreciate that in this conversation, in this place here too, because it is like, it's safe enough for you to be brave.
So the brave is like the next step. It's like, "If I can make it safe intentionally, then you can be brave enough." And then there's how she breaks down the B-R-A-V-E and the E and everything, and it's just the intentionality of a space where people are willing to challenge themselves, challenge assumptions. That's where the excellence happens. If we keep doing the same thing over and over, we're Blockbuster. Nobody wants that, right?
Paula Edgar: Rest in peace, throwback Thursday. Sorry about that.
Amber Lee Forrester: The CEO—who was the Blockbuster CEO when that happened? Because he or she must be so tired of being the butt of all corporate jokes.
Paula Edgar: When you don't listen, when you don't see innovation happening, when you push back, and it's like everybody's like, "Oh, no, we can't. AI is just a fad." I'm like, "Yeah."
Amber Lee Forrester: I've been around long enough to know the internet was a fad too. You thought you would just get away with not knowing that one.
Paula Edgar: That part—we were just talking about this yesterday. I was like, "I know what Netscape is." Half of y'all did not have to use AOL dial-up CDs. We are right—that's quick. That's only in the past 20-something years, maybe 30 years. So, yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yes.
All right. Well, what advice do you have for people who would consider themselves struggling, who are outwardly thinking about, "I have imposter syndrome," and they want to be more grounded in their sense of self? What advice would you give to them, folks who are honest about having that?
Amber Lee Forrester: I would first tell them to do a strengths assessment. I think that people, again, why I like to lean on the sciences, because you can't really argue with science and math.
Paula Edgar: So tell that to them. We digress.
Amber Lee Forrester: Because we want this podcast to go far. So I would tell them to really take a strengths assessment. I like the CliftonStrengths assessment and the VIA Character Strengths assessment. It is a big part of the work that I do in helping people take a strengths-based approach. When you know what your strengths are and you're solid 10 toes down in them, when your weaknesses come up, you have something to lean on.
It's not inauthentic. It's not a thing that you're telling yourself that you really don't believe about something that you don't like. There's an acceptance of that thing or a willingness to work on that thing. But I'm leaning on this thing that you're solid in. I know what I know about myself is this. What is that for you, Paula?
Paula Edgar: What do I know about myself?
Amber Lee Forrester: Yeah. What's one of your strengths, would you say?
Paula Edgar: My ability to connect with people, my passion for being impactful, my focus on having people show up as their authentic selves and with good lighting and great clothing. Yeah, passionate about and strong about a lot of things and leadership.
Amber Lee Forrester: So if there was something—what is an imposter thought that you might have had ever in life?
Paula Edgar: Thanks for asking. That people wouldn't listen to me. That was when I first started out as an entrepreneur. One of those things was like, "Why me? Why would people listen to me?" And that was a big one that I had to get over. Also, one that I continue to navigate, which is interesting—asking people for things, right? Because it means for me asking—
Amber Lee Forrester: Because as an entrepreneur, that's what you do.
Paula Edgar: It's what you're supposed to do, right? But I was also a cheerleader in high school. I was somebody who didn't ever have to ask; things would just come at me.
So when I have to ask, it feels very vulnerable because, couldn't you just give me the thing? But I also know it's something I need to work on, right? I need to ask more confidently. So yes.
Amber Lee Forrester: But what I know about you, what I'm going to guess is true about you, you've identified that, so that's important, right? Awareness around it. So you've identified it. So you know, sometimes when that little voice comes up that says, "Why are people going to listen to me?" Paula T. Edgar is going to use what Paula T. Edgar got to get what Paula T. Edgar wants. So what's the finish line for you?
So the imposter thought is getting in the way of something. What do you want? Because that's what's going to motivate you. So use what you got to get what you want. So if "Why am I… or are people going to listen to me?" but I'm engaging and I connect with people, then Paula is going to lean on those strengths of engaging and connecting with people and showing up with the red lips and the red glasses, being funny or engaging, right? And that is why people want to be around you, because people really want to be around a settled nervous system.
They want to be around a person who's comfortable in themselves and where they are. Your people are going to connect with you. Like another thing psychology and positive psychology tells us: 25% of people are going to like you and always like you. 25% are going to like you and stop liking you. 25% are going to not like you, then like you. 25% never liked you, ain't going to like you, period. Right? That's just what it is. We give ourselves permission to lean on our strengths. Like, yeah, that thing comes up. Okay, accept it. It is what it is. Let me lean on this.
Paula Edgar: Yeah. I love that you just broke down that 25, 25, 25, because it is what prevents a lot of people from showing up and particularly unsocial or wanting to have a brand because they feel like, "Well, what if people don't like?" So I'm always like, "What about—"
Amber Lee Forrester: Some people are not going to like you. I definitely have some people who don't like me. My whole intention is being positive and connecting with people. I do this work, but I'm human. There's some people who don't like me. It's just like this.
Paula Edgar: Yeah. I mean, the people who don't like me, number one: thanks for listening to my podcast. Second—
Amber Lee Forrester: The people who don't like you suck, but that's okay.
Paula Edgar: I'm like, "Don't like me, but still add to my numbers. Appreciate you.
Amber Lee Forrester: Like and subscribe.
Paula Edgar: It's a very interesting thing because, my therapist say I can't say interesting. It is sometimes very shocking to me that there's a truth that people don't like you. Because I think that we all have this ego place where we're like, "But we're likeable. Who raised you? Who hurt you? What happened? Why don't you like me?"
Amber Lee Forrester: I have dealt with—wanting to be liked has been at the core of imposter syndrome for me if I'm identifying what I have to talk back to.
So the fact that I broke it down is the fact that it comforted me in learning. So that's how—what we talk about—the science can comfort us. It's like, "Wait a minute. Oh, there are even people who just, like, you think are so likable. There are still people who don't." Somebody once told me Beyonce had fat knees. I said, "You know what? If you can find something wrong with Beyonce, you can find something wrong with me."
Paula Edgar: Oh, the haters are going to hate. Please, Lord, give me Beyonce's fat knees. Thank you so much."
Anyway, I'm glad we digressed because I think that was an important pivot. Now I want to ask you this: what do you do for fun?
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh my gosh, everything. I do work for fun. Like I love what I do. Look, I'm loving talking to you. I could show up and be on your podcast for fun. I do whatever sets my heart on fire. I'm curious. I'm curious about most everything. I horseback ride. I ride motorcycles. I jet ski like [inaudible] woman. I travel often. I drink lots of red wine. Also, I'm a Sancerre girl. I like a wine.
Paula Edgar: Yeah. Okay. A little Sancerre.
Amber Lee Forrester: I love a little shimmy shake with my friends out. I like to take long walks and hike. I make sure I know what sets my soul on fire, what gives me, that is my why is because I really want to do what I love for a living. I want to create a positive impact.
When I know that I can get through—this goes back to my quote at the beginning—I can get through almost any how, but that also takes—it's not plunging through without recognizing what I need. What I need is to be smiling and enjoying myself. If it's not for the day, then give me the part of the day that I can look forward to, that helps me get through the whole day because I know I'm going to hang out with my babies and do something fun or go have some red wine with my girlfriends.
Paula Edgar: I love that. One of my girlfriends said to me yesterday that she no longer wanted to breadcrumb her joy. It hit me. Everybody knows I [inaudible] place to do things, I'd be outside. But when she said it, it was like, "Imagine if we all just said our commitment is to finding and sitting in joy as much as we can, and when we're not in it, to remember that whatever time we're having, it is going to pass, and we will find another joy space," the world would just be better. It would just be better.
Amber Lee Forrester: [Inaudible] girlfriend. Let's go for red wine with her.
Paula Edgar: That's what I'm saying. Although I'm a bourbon girl.
Amber Lee Forrester: Oh, I love a bourbon, let's do it, old-fashioned. I'm here for it.
Paula Edgar: Done and done. Okay, so I ask everybody these two questions, which is: one, stand by your brand, where you're talking about branding, podcast is about branding, and I find that that's the set thing, you can have the same exact resume as somebody else, you can have the same experiences, but it's the you of it all that makes it different. So my question for you is: what authentic aspect of your personal brand will you never compromise on?
Amber Lee Forrester: The good feeling, form follows feeling. When I feel good, the form follows it.
Paula Edgar: Come on, nuggets.
Amber Lee Forrester: I was even having a conversation with another, I'm a DOE vendor. I have a mentorship program called POISED to Prosper. It's a life and career exploration and mentorship program for high school girls. My program is growing, and I'm starting to get into more and more schools. I was talking to another DOE vendor about the schools that they work with.
He was talking about some of the schools that just don't have good leadership and he's not really able to do his thing there. So I challenged him, as a vendor, to be picky about who his clients are.
Paula Edgar: Fire people, 100%.
Amber Lee Forrester: We don't have to walk around thinking that we're just fireable, and this doesn't go two ways. Like, if my feeling is that this is not a good place to do this work, or this person is not open or wanting to do this work, or you're just trying to check a box, I don't feel good. I can't come in and do good work. I'm not trying to mess up my brand.
Paula Edgar: I love that. I love that. All right. So Branding Room Only is the name of the podcast, which is a play on the term "standing room only," because I am clever. So what is your magic? What is that thing that would have a room full of people standing room only to experience about you?
Amber Lee Forrester: I don't know. I mean, have we seen us for the last 40 minutes? Hello. So it's a holistic thing for me, I think. When you asked me about my framework earlier, I thought we were going to talk about it for a moment. I have a POISED framework. POISED means Personal, Occupational, Intellectual, Social, and Emotional Development. It's the way that I take a holistic look at how we are being well. So when I'm stepping into a space, I'm thinking holistically about that magic. How am I personally doing? How grounded am I? How am I feeling before I get up on the stage? I'm looking at how even physically I'm showing up. I love that you wear red lipstick and red glasses because it's part of your brand and what it talks about you.
Whenever I come into a room where a lot of people are, something's going to pop about me. I'm going to be either in really high heels, a really bright color, really nice lips, really cute sunglasses or glasses, or a really nice statement skirt. There's going to be something about me that goes, "Oh, I like that on her." So I personally showed up. I felt good. I made sure I was intentional about looking good.
Then I stopped. With Shark Tank, a reason how I got investment with Daymond and Lori is that I knew my business. When you know your stuff, when you know your subject matter, then you can really show up and be in it. No slides that are not available are going to throw me off my game because I know what I'm talking about.
So that trilogy of I feel good, I look good, and I know my stuff, that's the magic. That's the confidence. If something came up, if I forgot a line in a speech and I'm doing a speaking engagement, and I forgot a session of it, I'm going to lean on another strength. I'm going to tell a joke or do something funny or point out my outfit or something like that and take a moment to collect myself. We have to do these moments with ourselves where we're like, "Okay, let me put myself on the spot. I'm going to lean on one of my strengths." Yeah. So I think that's part of the magic.
Paula Edgar: I love that. So tell people how they can find out more about you and the work that you do. Where should they go to connect with you?
Amber Lee Forrester: Please find me, people, because I love to connect with you. A couple of places. My company is Quartz, like the stone, Wellness Collective and QuartzWellnessCollective.com. My handle on IG is The Flow Coach. I just published a book. I'm a new author of, like I mentioned, POISED to Prosper, that program. It has a workbook. It is a personal growth and career exploration workbook called POISED to Prosper. You can find it by Googling it online. I also have an online community called The Well Zone on Mighty Networks, a space at the intersection of personal and professional development.
Paula Edgar: That is fantastic. Y'all go out and tell somebody who needs to, number one, work on their inner voice—their mama, whoever it is—is talking to them inside and think about how they show up, how they show out, and how they are memorable at all times, like Amber does. Tell a friend to tell a friend. You know, we out here. Everybody, tell a friend, listen to this. I think it'll change some lives, and we need some lives to be changed and for them to find that joy in a glass of wine. See you next time in the Branding Room. Bye, y'all.
That's it for this episode. I appreciate you hanging out with me on Branding Room Only. Now, please do me a quick favor: head over to ratethispodcast.com/branding so more people can join this conversation. And make sure to stop by at paulaedgar.com/events to see what's next. Whether I'm live, online, or in person, I'd love to see you there. See you next time in the Branding Room. And until then, stand tall, shine bright, and always stand by your brand.
